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Loving the unlovable


Think about a person who has wronged you. How do those thoughts make you feel?

Angry? Hurt? Hateful?? Now think about someone you love. What feelings are you experiencing? Joy? Appreciation? Happiness? Which responses do you prefer? Which ones resonate with your spirit? Which emotions remind you of the past, and which ones feel like the present?


God inside you, your spirit, loves everyone unconditionally. When you choose to feel anything other than love, it causes a detachment from who you really are. That’s why the feeling does not feel good, and why it causes dis-ease in you, the dis-ease is disease! Your spirt feels love, while your flesh is feeling hate. Your feelings and emotions manifest in your physical body, so why would you ever want to carry around feelings of bitterness, resentment and unforgiveness causing you mental distress and physical illness? It does not have to be this way; you have the option to change.


Would you believe me if I told you can overcome those feelings no matter what you experience? Even though you have every right to hold onto hate, doing so will only hurt you and keep you trapped in agony. We weren’t created for hate. It is contrary to who we are which causes very uncomfortable conflict inside. This is our internal guidance for knowing when our emotions aren’t aligned with love.


The key to conquer feeling hate is forgiveness. Forgiveness is for you, not them. Forgiving someone does not mean what they did was okay, nor does it mean you have to share that you are forgiving them. It also doesn’t mean you have to resume a relationship with them. Forgiveness actually has nothing to do with anyone else, and everything to do with you! It is setting them free so YOU can be free!


Choosing to love instead of hate will not only heal you mentally, but physically. I remember someone sharing a statement with me “unforgiveness is like you drinking the poison and wanting the other person to die”. Harsh, but very true.


So how do you accomplish this mission from hate to love, from unforgiving to forgiveness? It is about changing your perception. When someone hurts you intentionally, something is seriously wrong inside of them. Being hurtful isn’t who any of us truly are. Feeling compassion about what they may have gone through tends to ease up our feelings of animosity. You never know someone’s story, even if they told you everything, you can never know how they perceived it when it was happening to them, nor can you know the damage it caused. Many have been through childhood trauma of abuse and neglect, many have made decisions they deeply regret, if they never do the inner work, they are going to lash out and take it out on others, often the ones they care about the most.


In addition to changing perspective, realize that our memories are not always an accurate account of the truth. If you ask two people to describe an event, you are going to receive two different answers, oftentimes conflicting answers! No two people are going to react to, perceive or internalize the same situation identically.

Trauma to one might be physical abuse while to others it may be about not making the cheerleading squad in middle school. Who are we to say what others should and shouldn’t feel and/or how they should or shouldn’t react to life events?

It’s time to remember this truth. Your flesh has been hurt, not your spirit. No matter what has been done to your body, nobody can’t touch your spirit . . . . perfect God inside you!

It’s time to stop telling the stories of how others have ruined your life, and start controlling the thoughts that come to mind when you think of them, or just choose not to think about them at all. Stop allowing anyone else to have control of your mind, steal your energy, and determine your future. Offense is never conducive to wellbeing and personal growth.

If you are allow yourself to get to the point of truly loving the ones who have hurt you? Game over!!!!! This will change your life, and nothing will be the same! Once this is mastered, you will never allow it to happen again. Imagine a life free of hate. It’s time to take your power back, let go of the hurt and hate, remember who you are and always choose love!

RESET RESCUE can help you:

*Learn how to forgive

*Learn how to change your perspective

*Understand why you won’t let go of the past

*No longer feel offended

*Create a positive outlook for your future

*Choose love and not hate

*Live your best life!

It is so much easier to love than to hate. It’s a change in perception, a choice. Time for freedom from the hate that has ruled your life. Set them free and set yourself free! You can’t live in the present until you let go of your past.


Deb Sompel, Reset Rescue Coach

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